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Marriage conversation questions

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Marriage[edit | edit source]

Are you married? Where and when did you get married?
  • Are you married?
  • What are the advantages and disadvantages of being married?
  • What is the usual age for getting married in your country?
  • Some people get married very young. What age is too young?
  • What do you think is the ideal age for getting married - why?
  • Do men still go down on one knee to propose in your country? What do you think of this custom?
  • Does society only allow men to propose in your country or are things changing?
  • How many of your friends are actually married and how many live together without being married?
  • Arranged marriages used to be common in all parts of the world. What is your opinion of the practice?
  • In the US, Canada, most of EU and Taiwan same-sex marriage is now legal. What do you think of the idea of same-sex marriage?
    • What are the arguments against same-sex marriage?
    • What are the arguments for same-sex marriage?
  • If it were legal, and socially acceptable in your country, do you think it would be a good idea to have two wives?
  • If it were legal, and socially acceptable in your country, do you think it would be a good idea to have two husbands?
  • Do you think people change after getting married? If so, in what ways?
  • Is divorce easy or difficult in your country?
    • Do you think it should be made easier or more difficult?
  • If you are married, where did you go on your honeymoon? If you are not married - where would you like to go?
  • In Anglo-Saxon countries, traditionally, a man’s fiancée wore an engagement ring on the third finger of her left hand and later both the man and the woman wore wedding rings on that finger as well. The wedding rings were exchanged during the ceremony. Sometimes divorced people wear the ring(s) on the third finger of their right hand. What are the traditions in your country?
  • Many married couples argue about finances. Why do you think this is a common argument?
  • Should a couple live together before getting married? Why or why not?
  • Under what situations would you absolutely get a divorce? Why?
  • Should a person be limited to the number of times that he or she can get married? Why?
  • How would you advise a friend who is having an affair?
  • What should someone do if his or her spouse is cheating on him/her?
  • When is divorce an acceptable solution to marital problems?
  • What’s your idea of the perfect marriage? Do you think it is possible?

Pros and cons of marriage[edit | edit source]

Charles Darwin was a most logical man. When considering marriage he made out a list of "pros" and “cons" before making his final decision. We can see that he was most certainly a product of his time. What do you think of the items on his list?

Which, if any, would still be good reasons today, and which are no longer politically correct?

Which ones do you agree with?

Darwin’s list of pros[edit | edit source]

  • Children (if it please God)
  • Constant companion (friend in old age) who will feel interested in one
  • Object to be beloved and played with. Better than a dog anyhow
  • Home and someone to take care of house
  • Charms of music and female chit-chat
  • These things good for one’s health. Forced to visit and receive relations but terrible loss of time
  • My God, it is intolerable to think of spending one’s whole life, like a neuter bee, working, working, and nothing after all — No, no, won’t do
  • Imagine living all one’s day solitary in smoky dirty London House
  • Picture yourself with a nice soft wife on a sofa with a good fire and books and music perhaps compare this vision with the dingy reality of Great Marlboro Street, London
  • Freedom to go where one liked
  • Choice of Society and little of it
  • Conversation of clever men at clubs
  • Not forced to visit relatives and bend in every trifle

Darwin’s list of cons[edit | edit source]

  • Expense and anxiety of children
  • Perhaps quarrelling
  • Loss of time
  • Cannot read in the evenings
  • Fatness and idleness
  • Anxiety and responsibility
  • Less money for books, etc.
  • If many children, forced to gain one’s bread (but then it is very bad for one’s health to work too much)
  • Perhaps my wife won’t like London; then the sentence is banishment and degradation into indolent, idle fool

See also[edit | edit source]